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How to Say “No,” to them and “Yes.” to You!

How I learned to say no while retaining valuable relationships.

No. Not “No,..” not “No;…” just a simple “No.” There is so much power in being able to say no to people, events or things that don’t benefit you mentally, physically or financially. Although I’d admit, it is easier said than done…

My personality has always been very inviting and magnetic to meeting new people, making people feel comfortable and ensuring they are having a great time. I am the person who will make the new person in the group feel at ease by making sure they are introduced to everyone and making sure they have a dranky drank, too. Let’s face it, Ruby likes a lil’ sarsaparilla! (Shrugs) With that being said, I can find myself wanting to be a people pleaser.

I often find myself wanting to attend every event, showing up all the time and being super supportive which is where my inability to say no comes into play.

It’s not that I wouldn’t enjoy attending these events or the time being surrounded by friends and family but sometimes there are just things that take precedent. Those things could be me running around for a basketball tournament for my oldest son, or creating content for my blog, or just sitting on the couch catching up on my shows. (I am a reality TV connoisseur – I can’t help it! Recent highlight from reality TV I love is Marlo fixing Nene’s bun while in the middle of an argument. I was done! LOL)

The point is – it’s MY time and I choose how I want to spend MY time. During my pregnancy, this truly came to light for me. Grandma was just tired, y’all. There were times where I didn’t want to do much of anywthing nor go much of anywhere and “No.” became my friend. I was saying no with pride and feeling good! Now, the gag is, (spoiler alert) I am no longer pregnant. I can no longer use being pregnant as an excuse for not going, doing or participating but I’ve learned that I don’t need an excuse. I need the conviction of knowing what’s best for me and sticking to it. Time is of the essence! Life is too short to completely put your all into things that don’t reciprocate the same value!

Don’t feel like you have to justify your “No.” with a comma, semicolon or an explanation!

Now, I am not saying just abandon everyone and miss everything because that’s just wrong LOL Of course, there are certains things that you just don’t miss such as milestone events. You make time for what’s important!

Did I fear people feeling some kind of way and drifitng away from me? Yes, but I had to realize something.Those who matter won’t mind. Those who mind, don’t matter! Relationships are meant to evolve and those who are truly there for you will understand and may even learn to take a page from your book (if they haven’t already)! Take care of your boo boo! Feed your soul with the time you need to accomplish your goals, replenish your energy with self-love and care THEN worry about the rest.

Have you been exercising your right to say no?

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The world needs what you have!

It’s on you to share your talents, no one else!

People get so wrapped up wondering what others will say if they try multiple things. So you started on business, it didn’t work, now you want to try another one? So you got a degree in Economics but now you want to get into marketing? SO WHAT! DO IT!

People will judge you for not doing it their way. People will invoke THEIR societal stands and fears on you – don’t let them! It’s so important to live YOUR life for YOU! I can’t stress this enough.

You don’t know what you’ll be successful at unless you try it. You don’t know what will make you TRULY happy, unless you try it! The world needs what you have, so why are you waiting to give it? I’ll wait.


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DIY Whipped Shea Body Butter


Winter time is here and dry skin is near!


In this video, I will show you a quick and easy 3 step process to make the most nourishing whipped shea body butter to keep you moisturized and soft!


Shea Butter
Organic Coconut Oil

If you liked the video, don’t forget to like and subscribe.


Subscribe to my  blog by clicking here to get updates on new posts, recipes and more!  Follow me on InstagramFacebook and Twitter @ToBeRuby!



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It’s been a long time, shouldn’t of left you..

Hey y’all, guess who’s back?! ME!


I admit, I took a break from blogging during my pregnancy to enjoy the ride and fully embraced in the moment. Now, Nasir is here! And, you guys, I am obsessed with him. Like just watch him breathe while he’s sleep obsessed LOL I am reliving my oldest, Amari, being a baby and loving every second of it! But, I am ready to get back into the swing of things! I missed y’all!

Stay tuned for a video post this week discussing my hiatus and what you can look forward to in the future!

Stay tuned,

It’s me, Ruby B. Stay tuned to learn more about how it is “To Be Ruby!”

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Meet the Browns: Pregnancy Announcement!

I’ve been keeping a secrettttttt 😏 We are very excited to share the newest member of the Brown family will be joining us September 2017!

Did I design custom shirts for the whole family for a mini pregnancy announcement photo shoot? Ummmm is my name Ruby? 😩😂 Yassss for the dramatics, I LIVEEEEE! Y’all don’t know how excited I am to finally take these photos and share the news with the world!

Now that the cats out the bag. Feel free to drop suggestions on how to stay healthy during pregnancy while wanting to eat like an ogre 😩 I’m hungry now. Signing off, got to go eat. We liveeee baby!

Subscribe to my blog by clicking here to get updates on new posts, recipes and more! Follow me on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @ToBeRuby!




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Life Lessons with Ruby: “If it don’t fit, don’t force it!”

Life Lessons with Ruby:

“If it don’t fit, don’t force it!”


By now, yall know my parents were the kings and queens of sayings and life mottos. (Hey Mommy and Daddy! *Insert wave* As a child, I can remember this saying being shared when trying to stuff a toy in an overfilled toy box or squeeeeezing myself into a tight cubby hole to play in and my parent’s very vividly would say, “If it don’t fit, don’t force it!”

As a I reflect on this saying, (despite the gramtactial errors of it LOL) it makes me think of the relevance that it provides to my adult life in decisions amongst my personal growth, relationships and professional development.

As I ventured into the journey of entrepreneurship, I was quite unsure of what I wanted to do. Yes, of course I want to be a full time entrepreneur, creating my own destiny, flexibility to spend time with my family and ultimately creating a legacy that lives beyond me. Ok, great buttttt, HOW do I want to do “that”? What does “that” consist of? Social media provides accessibility to see other people in their passion. I knew I could do anything…. but what did I LOVE to do? Researching, thinking of my passions, joining mastermind groups and participating in webinars really helped me to hone in to my true heart’s desire.

I am true people person! I love hosting events, entertaining, engaging with people, hearing their stories and sharing my knowledge in all realms of lifestyle and beauty topics such as personal life challenges of balancing being a mother, wife and ultimately a woman. Sharing my favorite recipes, fashion, beauty tips and secrets coupled with the ability to meet masses of people via the internet lead to the creation of To Be Ruby!

Could I have become a fitness guru selling personal training, meal plans and exercise plans? Yes, but that’s not my passion (and let’s face it, I am not a size 2 and love macaroni and cheese, tewwww much.)

The point is, if it doesn’t fit don’t force it.

If you are not happy in your current career, don’t force yourself into staying just because of the considerable pay, or that you spent 4 years getting that degree and dreading those student loans – it’s not worth it! Now, I am not saying go quit your job and become a floating spirit in the Cayman Islands (unless you can afford to which leads to me being envious (isnert emoji) because child bills still need to be paid. You gotta eat and how you going watch your favorite reality shows if you don’t have electricity? I’ll wait.   What I am saying is, channel that unhappiness to a passion to pursue what makes you truly happy. If you love creating oil paintings, come home every night and work on your paintings, market them on social media, build a brand to help you launch yourself into that preferred field!

Now, not everyone wants to be an entrepreneur which is perfectly fine, it’s not meant for everybody and shouldn’t be forced on everybody!

If you want to stay in corporate America but want to switch careers from finance to marketing, share your passion with your current manager, ask for additional projects that would give you those transferrable skills to transition into the new field and network with the department that you are interested in. Don’t wait around and HOPE that life happens to you. Make it happen!

When it comes to relationships with friends, family and/or significant others, “If it doesn’t fit, don’t force it!”  If they are not pouring into you as much as you pour into them, Nino said it best, CANCEL THEM!

Life is tewwww short to chase relationships, chase companionship and to chase people who don’t want to be there! If you stop reaching out to them, will they call? If the answer is no, they need ta go! I will not invest energy into things or people who don’t make me happy. Neither should you, boo boo. After all, why would you want to surround yourself with people who don’t appreciate you or your presence? Their presence is no longer needed, dismissed.

Have you noticed that you are forcing tasks, things or people that don’t fit in your life? If so, what are you going to do about it? Comment below.

Subscribe to my  blog by clicking here to get updates on new posts, recipes and more!  Follow me on InstagramFacebook and Twitter @ToBeRuby!


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Brita Stream Product Review

Sidebar: Maybe I have a thing for the color red 🤔

Anywho, stay focus Ruby lol Recently, I committed to only drinking water, no teas, coffee or juices. The improvements in my skin, energy and my overall feeling has been amazing! Must keep this up! I had juice yesterday and definitely felt the difference – back on track! Did I mention I lost 2 lbs? 💁🏽


Honestly, truly Brita has stepped their drip drip game way up! I remember standing at the sink for what seemed to be 5 days waiting on the pitcher to fill while filtering the water. Now, the new Brita Stream allows you to fill it up quickly and filters rapidly WHILE YOU POUR! Come through with the ingenious idea! Have y’all tried it? Let me know what you think! If not, click below to order it and have it waiting for you at the do’!

💧: Brita Stream

🌹: Compliments of Bay ❤
💅🏽: OPI Cajun Shrimp

I received my Brita Stream complimentary, but all opinions are my own.


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Product Crush of the Week: Maybelline New York Volum Express Mascara

Product Crush of the Week goes to Maybelline New York Volum Express Mascara, Classic Black!

I love how effortlessly this mascara goes on, allowing you to layer for extra thickness without the clumpy look! See the before and after in my video including the lower lash.

This my trusty dusty natural look but for a more dramatic look, apply additional coats!


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Get Ready with Me Date Night Look Video Collaboration!

Ms. Rika of @RikaGlam and I loved filming a cute and easy get ready video featuring some pieces from the collection. While I helped Erika accessorize her outfit,  she gave me a quick makeup beat to the GAWDSSSSS before my hot date.

Keep up with us! 

Lifestyle & Beauty Blogger Ruby
Twitter: @ToBeRuby
Instagram:  @ToBeRuby

Facebook: @ToBeRuby


Makeup Artist Rika
Instagram: @GlamRika
Twitter:  @GlamRika


Jewelry Company, Branded Royalty

Shop the collection:

Instagram: @BrandedRoyalty

Facebook: @ToBeRuby


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Ruby’s Recipes: Chicken Teriyaki Pineapple Boat

Now, ya’ll know I love taking a simple dish and putting some stank on it! 💁🏽

Chicken teriyaki is a quick and delicious dish that’s filling and add the pineapple boat, very appeasing to the eye. My mom taught me, you first eat with your eyes! If a dish doesn’t look good, people are going to think it doesn’t taste good. One of my favorite parts about serving meals and hosting parties is the aesthetics! Of course, it can’t just look good, it needs to last good too. Don’t worry, boo. I got you on that! Full recipe on how to whip this meal up in under an hour!

1 cup of brown Rice

1 pound of boneless skinless chicken thighs

1 pineapple

1 bottle of Lawry’s chicken teriyaki marinade

1 head of cabbage

3 medium zucchinis

2 bunches of broccoli

1 bag of baby carrots

Chicken Thighs:

Dice chicken thighs, season with lawless seasoning salt and pepper and let marinade inelastic ziplock bag for 30 minutes in the sauce. Prepare rice and then come back to cook chicken as it only takes about 10-15 minutes to cook.

Once completely marinated, add oil to skillet, chicken and cook throughly for 15 minutes until done.

Brown Rice:

Brown rice will take the longest to cook, so start this first! Let 2.5 cups of water boil then add 1 cup of brown rice. Reduce heat to medium and let rice cook for about 30 minutes.


Next, chop cabbage in fourths and then eights.The thinner the cut, the quicker it cooks. When you trying to feed these men folk who come home starving, you need to optimize time chile!

Slice zucchini vertically, chop broccoli florets into small bite sized portions while keeping carrots whole. Add about 1/4 cup of water to a skillet and cook veggies on medium until tender. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Let simmer while preparing chicken. The cabbage and carrots takes the longest of the veggies. Thus, chop cabbage first and add carrots to the skillet first to allow it to start cooking.


Pineapple Boat

Slice pineapple through the center. Be careful when cutting through the head of the pineapple as you don’t want to damage the leaves for presentation sake. The center of the pineapple is the toughest portion. Normally when I cut the pineapple, I would core the center but since I wanted to preserve the pineapple for presentation, you have to manually remove the core. Cut the pineapple vertically then horizontally to make lines to easily remove the pieces. Once the pieces are removed, take about a half of cup of the pineapple chunks and dice them into small bite sized pieces. Add those pieces to the chicken marinade. Now, go back to chicken section and prepare the thighs. Go shanty, it’s ya birthday!


Rice? Done. Chicken thighs? Done. Veggies? DONE! Time to plate it and get piggy with it! (Nah, nah,nah nah nap!)

Presentation is key!

Done! “I just hit a stain, faneto!” How do you like it? Comment below!

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